Thursday, July 2, 2015

Speaking to Mountains

In the last (almost) two years, during this struggle to get pregnant, I've done a lot of talking about infertility... I've talked to my family, I've talked to most of my friends, I've talked to my husband, I've talked to doctors, and I've done even more talking with God.  I've begged and pleaded with the One who can give me the baby that my heart desires.

In addition to all the talking, praying, and begging, I have done hours and hours of research about this problem. I've tried every trick, supplement, method you can think of.  Or at least I thought I had...

A few nights ago, I had a dream that I was in some water and there were snakes swimming around me.  Sounds terrifying right?  But I wasn't scared in the dream.  Whenever a snake approached me, I grabbed it just below its head and popped its head off with my thumbs.  I know that's gross!  It wasn't as gory, in the dream, as it sounds.  And I should add that this was not the first dream I've had in the last couple of months that included snakes approaching me and me killing them in some form or fashion.  I've been reading a great book on Biblical dream interpretation, and it says that a snake (or serpent) represents Satan.  I don't think it takes a gifted dream interpreter to figure out what these dreams mean, but I didn't think much of it until I came across this verse:

Mark 11:22-24

And Jesus answered saying to them, "Have faith in God. Truly I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, 'Be taken up and cast into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says is going to happen, it will be granted him.  Therefore I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they will be granted you..."

Did you catch that?  Whoever SAYS to this mountain.

Two years in, and I can say that infertility is the "mountain". But I don't think I've said anything to the "mountain" itself in all this time.

God didn't give me infertility.  He created us to be whole and fruitful.  The first thing He said to man was "Be fruitful and multiply" (Gen 1:28). He also said that no one would miscarry or be barren in His land (Ex 23:26).  All good gifts come from the Lord and THIS "MOUNTAIN" is not a good gift.  I'm getting hot just typing this because I'm JUST. SO. DONE. with this mountain.

I've done a LOT of talking with Jesus these last two years, but not a whole lot of exercising my authority over the enemy.

Instead of trampling the enemy (Luke 10:19) with my God given authority in Jesus, I've let him trample ME.  

What would I do to an actual person who steals my joy, hurts my family, and violates my body? Would I grab him by the neck and pop his head off?  (OK, maybe that's a little much, but you see where I'm going with this).  More importantly, what would Jesus do?  I have the four Gospels as my proof and my truth that Jesus would cast out the enemy, heal me, and restore what was lost.  But when Jesus died on the Cross, he took barrenness, sickness, disease, sorrow, and sin with Him and left an inheritance of fruitfulness, health, joy, and righteousness (Isa 53:5, Matthew 8:16-17).

Jesus already fought the enemy and won.  In my dream with the snakes, I believe He was showing me that it's up to me to use my God-given authority in Jesus Christ to send Satan and this mountain on their way.

How will I do that?  I have some ideas, but I'm going to let the Holy Spirit guide me.  This was His idea, spoken to me in that dream, and revealed to me in the Word.  I do plan on writing about it so that I can praise Him for what He has already done and give Him glory when He gives the good gift I am praying for!

But I want to make it clear that this isn't just "something else I'm trying to get pregnant and I hope it works".  The Holy Spirit has spoken via a dream and I am just being obedient and answering His call to write about it.

No matter what kind of sickness or infertility or diagnosis that you are facing right now, please know that it is NOT from God.  I hope you are now as angry as I am at the enemy and that it gives you the strength to fight him with your faith that Jesus has already defeated him.  

1 comment:

  1. Beautiful. I've been analyzing "mountains" for years now and I agree with you on so many things. Your faith will get you through this. I'm so thankful that you have sweet Berkley. Max was so healing for me while I tried and tried to have another baby. I love you so much, Niki, and your prayer is mine, too.



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